The happiness of receiving often pales in comparison to that of giving. This one lesson that parents share with children goes deeper than materialism. It essentially highlights the importance of being socially aware, of seeing yourself as part of a community, and of striving to make others happy. A University of Toronto study showed that there is a definite science to gift giving. Experiences top material items when it comes to really making a mark, say researchers, since doing something new, exciting, and fun, bring us closer to each other. This is just one of many ideas you can share with children when it comes to gift giving time.
Experiences Are Free
One vital lesson kids can learn is that the best gifts often cost nothing. To make your point, ask your child what their ideal day would involve. They might answer that it would be a day out on the beach or at a summer fair; perhaps it might involve a meal and a movie with you. Discuss time with your children – how it can be a precious commodity we don’t often have enough of, and how giving someone your full time and attention while taking part in a fun experience together can make them feel happier than even the most expensive present.
Understanding The Different Love Languages
It is said that most people have a preference for one or two ‘love languages’. That is, each of us give and prefer to receive love through one or more of the following five ways: words of kindness, material gifts, favors, quality time, and physical touch. Children can take time to build up the quality of empathy through observation of their loved ones. If you are Dad, for instance, and mother’s day shopping is coming up, ask your children about what they think their mom’s favorite hobbies are. Your spouse may love makeup, great food, or eco products like natural candles or skincare. Make a list alongside your kids and let them choose from among the things everyone knows Mom will love.
The Little Details That Count
“Do you remember the time we were at the shop and your sister saw that toy she really loves?” “Didn’t your brother say he would love to have that cool set of shoes we saw?” “Didn’t your dad say he loves modern art?” These questions highlight one important thing about gift giving: it is important to listen to our loved ones and remember the things they said they wanted. Doing so shows them we listen to them and care about their hopes and desires; make it a point to remember what they said when a special occasion arises. By recalling expressed wishes to our children, we can teach them how to be good listeners and take stock of what others truly desire for a special occasion.
In order to make others happy, we need to give gifts that go beyond the immediate ‘wow’ factor. It takes time, effort and sensitivity to work out whether a friend or family member will be happier with a beautiful designer gift or a fun picnic out in the park with home-baked goods. Everyone has a language and a personal idea of ‘magic’. Helping your child solve the sometimes complex puzzle of gift giving will teach them an important lesson: it truly is the thought that counts.
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Article submitted by: Karoline Gore
